Shake Your Booty and Don’t Give Pop Quizzes
When I was in 2nd grade, my teacher was new and she obviously hadn’t spent much time around young children. One day she was feeling especially out of her comfort zone and thought she needed to find a way to entertain the class. So… she walked to the front of the room and said, “kids, I am now going to spin around for you.” I don’t know why she thought this would be entertaining, but approximately half the class was clamoring for “more! more!” And the teacher kept spinning until one of the female students called out “they just want to see your underwear.” The teacher promptly stopped.
Teaching second graders is a completely different game from teaching college students. Sort of. In college, students (or their parents) are paying tuition and believe that they deserve to get whatever they want. The other big difference is that college students are above the legal age of consent, so it’s no longer entirely illegal if you give them the lingerie shots they clamor for. Of course, college kids won’t be satisfied with just seeing your underwear; they get that all the time in the dorms. Today’s students need to see you strut your stuff so they know you’re their equal. (This must be why ratemyprofessors includes a chili pepper for students to identify their “hot” teachers.)
Always remember that egalitarianism must come first when it comes to teaching. Shaking your booty shows them that you’re as dumb and horny as they are; the best teachers are always the ones that students can relate to. And forget about all those pop quizzes; testing students’ knowledge implies that you know more than they do, and that’s an absolute no-no. You are fellow explorers on a quest for knowledge and the most valuable knowledge you can discover together is disco butt exercises.