What a former college instructor really thinks…

Proposed Biology Course: The Anatomy of Kittens

College students usually hate science classes and professors are often stuck trying to find a way to make the subject interesting.  As we all know, there is one foolproof way to get students interested in anything: add some cute, cuddly kittens.

And it works so well with an anatomy course, too.  You can talk about all the parts of a foot and then show a cute little kitty paw.  How adorable!  And having a kitten in front of the classroom means that the students will always be looking in your direction instead of at the clock.

But you may object: anatomy courses usually require dissections and there’s no way a professor could ever convince students to slice into a kitten.  Your point is well taken, but you’d be wrong.  When it comes to academics, students are always looking for the easiest way to get something done, and the kittens make dissections so much easier.  Because kittens are small and young, their skin is much easier to pierce with the scalpel.  And as an added bonus, they don’t yelp as loud or claw as hard as a fully grown cat; this is especially important if a student applies an inadequate dose of formaldehyde before starting to cut.  As you can see, everyone benefits when you bring kittens into the lab!

The janitors benefit too because they won’t have to clean up the mess.  Just tell your students to wrap up their kittens and bring them home when the dissection is done.  Their dogs will appreciate the tasty treat.

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